The Salem Stalker, Part 2

Ok, so Marlena confesses to the crimes.  But everyone is like, "Why would Marlena do this!?"  Especially her husband, John and her daughter Sami.  So, she's in jail and there's some deal with a prisoner named Crystal Chablis that I don't remember anything about.  So, Marlena escapes jail and gets shot on the roof by a police sharpshooter.  Yeah.  So, she's dead.  But Sami swears Marlena is really alive.

So, we get all these scenes where Marlena is in her coffin yelling that she's still alive, but then they open the coffin and no, she's not alive.  John even stabs her chest to prove she's dead.  Except she really is alive.  Because they have the funeral.  And we see Marlena reciting the Lord's Prayer. As she plummets through a really crappy CGI inferno.  Next episode, she's walking through a tropical place that looks like Salem (it's really the Salem sets with potted Palm trees and sunlight) and there's Alice Horton to welcome her. 

You think that's crazy?  Turns out everyone who died in Salem is actually alive.  Yeah. On an island called Melaswen.  That's New Salem backwards.  And so they whine and try to figure out what's going on.  And then it's revealed that it was Tony who did all this and that what we saw the past YEAR was actually just Marlena's memories of the events, but that it was actually Tony who was killing, er "killing" everyone.  Yeah.  So then, somehow, Victor was also on the island even though he was killed by Jan Spears and not by Marlena/Tony.  Ok.  Then the island was blown up and the survivors were picked up by a Japanese Fishing Trawler.  I don't think they ever showed Alice during all this because Frances Reid is pretty much a frail old lady.  But still, Roman and Marlena don't make it back and are being held in Tony's Castle in Downtown Europe.

Do you now see why this was the most awesome and STUPID thing that ever happened to Days?  It's great that it was reset and some of the people are still alive.  Ok, actually, I would've been ok with Abe staying dead because he's so boring now days.  Oh, and when everyone got back they started this storyline where everyone was getting weird diseases but they totally dropped those except for Jack's mystery illness (which brought us Patch back to the canvas) and Abe's blindness, which was boring.  Like Abe.